I think my boyfriend is suffering from impotence?
I have been with my boyfriend for three years now and our sex life has always great and plenty full.
However the last three months or so sex has been very infrequent, and he never seems to initiate anymore. I asked him a few times but he just said he was tired or that he was stressed out.
I was starting to think he didnt fancy me anymore or something but lsat night we were doing some foreplay and he was really hard, however when he went to go inside me he went soft.
He broke down and told me that this keeps on happening to him and that he was so embarrased and ashamed about it that he was avoiding sex. He said that he had been too ashamed to tell me and was hoping it would just sort itself out.
I really love the guy and I am in it for him not the sex. He is really stressed out with college at the moment and sometimes cant sleep from the stress. Could this be a cause? Also he has been smoking because oif the stress. Could This be a cause?
How can I help?
He is only 22!
I don’t really know what to do or say to make him feel better.
Is there any point in going to the doctor? Will they just try to give him Viagra?
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May 30th, 2009 at 10:20 am
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They both could cause it…smoking restricts blood vessels, and stress is just….well, stress…don’t worry…he’ll come (no pun) around!!!
May 30th, 2009 at 1:00 pm
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My husband of 3 years in pretty much as your bf.
The thing is that he is not that stressed and he just refused to go to a doctor. I hope your bf will have more initiative and actually go see a doctor now.
If he continues like this, I wouldn’t suggest marrying him. It will ruin your life and your health.
May 31st, 2009 at 4:20 pm
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Smoking can cause impotence in the long term but this is almost certainly stress. To get a stif**y you need to be able to relax which is why men get them in the morning, if you’re tense you won’t get one, or if you do then suddenly you think of something and whomp….. It gets worse when it happens once because as soon as you get into you thehn worry it’s going to happen… so it does. What to do. Have sex but not intercourse- touchy touchy – for at least a month don’t even think of it even if you both want to. Go back to teenage fumbling! If you are into or*l then that could work to show you are interested….. Then try more – you are an angel to be so concerned and appreciate that it could be what he’s going through. Take all the pressure off, keep loving him and it’ll come good.
June 2nd, 2009 at 7:11 pm
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drink first it will relieve his stress that might work or just skip the foreplay next time if he can only stay hard for so long
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:48 pm
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Smoking does reduce blood flow so it won’t be helping him but it’s probably not the main problem. I reccomend that you take the pressure off the situation by just playing with each other for a while and not have penetrative sex. Soon enough you might find he regains confidence in bed.
June 5th, 2009 at 6:23 pm
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try something sexy
June 6th, 2009 at 1:16 am
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he is in love with someone else and afraid to tell you. that realy happens when you love someone else, because your heart just isnt in it.